What if?

Jul 21 2009

I’ve had a lot of time for reflection during the last 5.5 wks. If you missed it, a lot changed in my life after my leg decided to pick a fight with a fast moving boulder on Mt Nebo.

I realized last week that a lot of that reflective time has been consumed with what I’m going to call the “What if?” game. I think it really hit me last Thursday when I had a Wilderness Rescue Reunion BBQ at my house, and we all relived that fateful day of June 13th.

What if that rock had bounced different and missed you? What if it’d have hit someone else? What if we’d have heard it coming and all jumped out of the way? What if we wouldn’t have stopped in the gully? What if we’d have left camp 5 minutes earlier that morning? What if we would have turned around earlier/later with the thunderstorm? What if there hadn’t been a thunderstorm at all? What if we’d have taken another 90 seconds at our lunch break? What if it’d have hit my leg differently? What if it’d have hit me in the back? What if it’d have hit me in the head?

I could type those questions out all day long. Specific to an freak accident where I was in the wrong spot for the 10 seconds it took that rock to come loose and crash down a remote snow gully to some resting spot below.

It gets in your head and it’s hard to get out. Especially when something big happens like that. Happens in business and entrepreneurship too. What if we’d have raised capital from Sequoia in 2006 for Doba? What if we’d have never took a leap of faith and exhibited at our first eBay Live in New Orleans? What if I hadn’t convinced Blaine to come work for Doba instead of the SEC? What if my friend Nate Jensen hadn’t decided to room with someone else and suggested I share a room with Dave Gray freshman year at BYU? What if..? What if…? What if…? Goes on and on.

You can’t play the “What if?” game. It’s draining. It’s defeating. It’s focused on the past, not the future. All of those questions above about my accident, well, they didn’t happen. What did did. And I’m cool with it.

More on that later…

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Comments Filed under Entrepreneurship, Life
  • @Jeremy - A great reminder. I'm not a religious dude by any means, but I do believe that stuff happens for a reason. Not to sound too creepy, but I even think you and I connected for a reason. Who knows, right?

    Thanks for making me think. Reading this at 30,000 feet on Delta flight from Chicago to SLC using inflight WiFi courtesy of GoGo. Nice, huh?

    DJ Waldow
    @djwaldow
  • Stu, thanks for chiming in! I can only imagine the 'what ifs' you've had in your head. Great thoughts! I sure have realized I do more complaining than I should. All in all I'm pretty spoiled on so many levels. You can't change what you can't change. Good advice.
  • I had a single "what if" moment when I had my motorcycle accident. I told a nurse that had I taken a different route home (which I normally would have done) then I wouldn't have been in the hospital. The nurse chewed me out. Put a stop to that kind of thinking right then and there.

    Sure, I still wish what had happened to me hadn't. After all, everything I ever wanted to do in life is no longer an option. But I try to not let it affect me otherwise. Like you said, it's draining and defeating. And most importantly, it changes absolutely nothing.

    I have a Marine friend who served in Vietnam. During the last month of his tour, his platoon was ambushed and he was the only survivor. Well, he's a little messed up over it, but he asked me one day, "How you doin' Stu?"

    I said, "I can't complain."

    He quickly responded with, "Good, because it wouldn't do you any good anyway!"

    With that attitude, he came home from Vietnam and became a huge success. I guess the point is... oh wait, that's probably what you're going to talk about next :)
  • "You can’t play the “What if?” game. It’s draining. It’s defeating."
    ^^^
    That's so true, man.

    Asking "What If" questions held me back for quite a while in my affiliate marketing, but it wasn't until I decided to stop being cautious lazy and actually did something productive that I started making money.

    Real good advice. Glad that you didn't get pwn3d by that rock any worse than you did!
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